ANd into summer we gratefully charge

FInally. Long days. Short nights. Being outside for 8 hours during the day. Little league.  Goat shows. 4-H. Gardening- except that I put my garden in 7 years ago, and during that time the maple trees have grown tall enough that it is now in shade. I have to move the garden.

Bought a new pygmy buck two months ago- has a reserve champion under his belt already. It didn't take long to figure out why my old buck was low in the shoulder muscle... he has built up his musculature since he now has a buddy to toss horns with. 

I have hit five months. Baby appears to be doing fine, despite my inability to breathe.  I will be on my knees delivering late summer kids with a 7 month pregnant belly.  Rich is kicking his classes around the block- scoring A's this summer semester. One final semester after this summer... If all goes well from here on out, I will be attending his graduation with a month old infant. Woot. 

Can't ride. Adam. the Tae Kwon Do cowboy down the road, wants to ride Gilbert during the summer for me.... I hope he does. GIlbert has always been a man's horse. A woman's pet, but he rides so well for men. Some horses are just like that.  

It's a time of expectations. My parents have been on the lookout for property near them, which will be great since we can trade child care for car and lawn care.  Rich is thinking he will look for an engineer position in Milwaukee and live with my parents until all is for sure... that we can find land, that he likes the job, and we have good backup plans.  ( The tough part is that one of our convictions for living is that we live on land that can sustain us, yet not pay more for a mortgage than a minimum wage job can support) Yeah. Finding a 6 acre farmette in workable shape and manage a mortgage less than $800? Well, we found it out here in Rock co, but in Washington, Ozaukee? I think not.  Our little farm is 42% paid off in a mere 8 years... I am loathe to start all over again, but know out chances for Rich finding stable, lucrative employment out here is slim.  But, the counties near my parents are so overpopulated and zoned ridiculously... most allow ONE horse per 5 acres.  Uh, what? Why?  You can keep a horse quite easily on half an acre if you feed well, manage your pasture, and practice fly control. I can see why they don't want 5 horses per acre, but c'mon...

We're all stars now.... at the goat show......

It rawked.
We didn't get any championships but the does were always in the lineup. Met and made new friends, saw my mentor who sold me my new little boy buck, (and drooled over her does as always)
The pinnacle, though, was when the kids did showmanship. Tell me they don't look like professionals already.
My very sweet, but clueless-about-animals mother asks, "How do you get goats that are in such perfect proportion to each child?" I laugh. The does are mother and daughter, which is why they stood so nicely next to each other throughout the whole class.
Rich is in the background. You can see how enthralled he was to come along.
Our chickies arrived last week. Sweet and fluffy. They are growing like crazy and I can't wait for them to go outside.
This pregnancy is kicking me. I am tired. Bloated. Exhausted. Being alone is hard as well. I think Rich has been home for maybe 10 dinners this semester.
Behind us, my extremely-wealthy neighbor has three lovely foals- one colt, two fillys- by top class stallions. They are amazing. Walking up to see them helps a lot.
My kids are wonderful at home. At school, my son is having issues still. This will always be. I can't help but think he's going to be in Alaska at some point in his life....

Kentucky

The surreality of our drive thru Kentucky still haunts me. The first day we saw so much money, horses worth 250 million dollars, foals worth a million, offices that looked bigger than the largest houses I ever see in Wisconsin.
Then we head over to Eastern Kentucky (coal Miner's Daughter) and saw houses and poverty that made ME feel like I lived in a Mansion. And, believe me, we don't.

This pic threw me. The TV escaped unscathed when the house collapsed.

I got a pic and tour with Herman Webb, Loretta Lynn's brother.

I loved his albino mule. There were s many half starved dogs around, I wanted to bring one home but Rich put his foot down. I do admit, I was worried about one of those mountain dogs eating the kids on the way home.

Well, it's been a while since I updated. Rich is getting ready to graduate in December, and made his first appointment as a paid motivational speaker. He saved the money to start a scholarship in in the troubled neighborhoos he grew up in. I'm tremendously proud of that.
The boy is stopping behavirs that have been going on since the dawn of time.
Last week he started his homework. Willingly.Without.A.Tantrum. He finished it flawlessly.


That's never happened before.
He's going to be a Webelos. Pride abounds.
We said goodbye to Harmon, the oldest living Smith. We saw him two days before he died. I got to kiss the top of his head and tell him how sorry I was I never met his wife and that I loved him. He loved my husband, so I love him.

Goats ( and kids, see above) and chickens abound. Repairs abound.

It's snowing, near 7:30, and still light. It makes me feel like the world is upside down.

Issue Redux.

The classroom...

SO, we were having issues... no, the school was having issues... wait, the boy had issues with the school.... um, just social issues, he got mostly A's but was driving everyone nuts.

He punched a little girl.  Ok, like a lightning strike, that grounded me fast.  Something was not going to give... the child that was my boy HAD given. He'd collapsed. He was helpless and worthless in his own body, so low that He. Punched. A. Little.Girl.  

Not an OK child. 

  The issues led to issues that touched off issues for me, being raised in a Catholic knuckle rapping school and having issues with psychopharmacology being a huge lobbying group in the public education realm. 

Too. Many.Issues.

Boy is now in a new school that deals heavily with dealing with issues, snapping them, and recycling them into bicycles for orphans.  Then it goes on to edumucate the whole child- spirit, moral conscience, and social responsiblity.... and yes, academics too.

He got 100% on his spelling today. He was so proud. And, he is learning to crochet me a hat.  

Before class begins, the kids chant an affirmation of their worth, their strength, and the promise that each day the sun will rise to greet them. It might be cloudy, it might be rainy, but Sun will be there each day. 

I may have to take a second job at McDonald's to pay the tuition, but it's worth it. He comes out of school smiling, happy, proud. When someone calls him dumb, he brushes it off and goes on. In the old school, he flipped and punched people. 

They don't have a gym. They have a movement room with peach walls and a soft cork floor. It smells like clove and lavander, not like a gym. It's unreal. 

I'm a cynical, researching, curious person. I tend to read on stuff to death before I make a decision. But this school just kind of slid into my life, into my son's life, so easily and effortlessly that I accepted it as vital to him before I even knew much about the curriculum. 

It's impressive. I can tell you that.  For starters: 1) No plastic in the school. Only natural textiles, woods, pottery, silk,beeswax, etc. 2) The kindergartners grind their grains for snack oatmeal, one serves, one helps wash up.... family style. 3) No media influences. No ads from the Dairy council, the vaccination nazis,  cheerleading squads, or *shudder* Hannah Montana. 4) The kids are allowed to talk. A lot. And the teacher doesn't intervene in unpleasant arguments.

Everything is pleasing to the eye. They have time for the kids. Time is only measured in rhythms and tasks. The clocks are incidental. 

They get hot tea, in their own mugs, after cold playtime.  Of course, they go wash their mugs when they are done. The boy has been begging me to buy almond milk for him, as he loves it in tea now. 

No pity. Total accountability.

And this weird feeling from his teacher that he is not a problem to solve.

I hope it lasts. I really do. He's been a totally different child since he left the last school. I really hope this is the answer. 

Going on 17 years now..

And he is still my light, my love, my inspiration.
I wil never stop loving this man.

mushiness

Humility and the responsibility for the lives I am interlaced with are my key focus at the moment. Not a New Year’s Resolution…. It’s just that I had a day that happened to gift me with plenty of time to reflect on the gifts we have, and the false guilt I carry for not having things I think we need but truly don’t.
Mark’s lovey Dave, for Xmas, gave my kids what should be the worlds most annoying toy, but in reality are SO AMAZINGLY FUN that everyone that touches one can’t resist them. They are plush caped monkeys with slingshot arms that emit eardrum rupturing screams at top volumes as they are launched. We had Evelyn’s 4th birthday party today, and all 4 cousins got to come and launch Superstar screaming Monkey.
Trent, the 7 year old, isn’t one that interacts with me too much…. He is very sweet but with 4 other boys around, hanging out with the 33 year old farmer aunt isn’t Fun #1.
But he came to me to learn how to slingshot the monkey…. I got the opportunity to put my arms around him, show him how to fit his fingers into the monkey’s paws, and stretch the tail back to let the screaming primate fly.
I don’t know why, but the fact that he came, asked my help, and was overjoyed at the subsequent rocketing primate was the one of my high points that day, (remember, I got to see Evelyn blow out her candles, open her gifts, and wake up to a pink –streamered bedroom festooned with balloons)
I got to have a moment with my nephew. That’s pretty much what I live for.
Ciara’s cat kept sticking by Collin.
Evie got her garishly decorated cake, the kids devoured it, and she got all the pink-wrapped tiny pieces of plastic she could have hoped for. It was touching to see She and Dommie under the table playing with the tiny animals. Remember, Dom had this toy IN HIS HOUSE and was not allowed to touch… now he finally got to play with it.
Collin helped me with chores and found three eggs that I missed, not to mention feeding the hens.
The rest of the time was talk and adult jokes.
And amazing chicken.
I can’t look at Ian and my nephews without seeing them as tromping is as big teenagers and devouring 5 pizzas at a feeding. It’s not the feeding I dread… it’s that I will miss the chasing and jokes and little kid antics that makes this time so fun, so fleeting.
It was a Happy New year, a Happy Birthday, and we still have all of our immediate family alive and well (though Jaden has a bit of a limp, and Claire still has yet to receive her Tofurkey)
We came the closest we ever have to losing my Dad two months ago,
I am so glad he is still here, and great uncle Harmon.
It’s a recession , we’re broke, but I am more thankful then I think I have ever been.